Commute Week, Part IV

Prequel #1: was that Idol's All Star Medley or did I have a nightmare when I dozed off? Freda Payne was...ghastly, simply ghastly. Thelma Houston, my son said it, looked like she belonged on the corner, though she can still sing. KC, well he wasn't so bad.

Prequel #2: As I was driving home yesterday, I came up behind a new looking car bearing the license plate "WED IV 25". The plate took me a moment to decipher, and I now wish the woman driving it a happy anniversary. That is the conclusion of "True Stories from My Wednesday Commute".

Today, class, we will learn about Paul Cornell, the king of networking, who invented the commuter suburb in these parts.

Cornell's family had moved to Illinois, following the death of the Paul's father when the boy was age nine. Paul worked his way through school, passed the bar exam and moved to Chicago in 1847.
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Chicago at this time was extremely walkable, with everything within a couple miles of the city center. Most people worked close to home, as the Dan Ryan, the Toyota Prius and the Howard Stern Morning Show had not yet been invented in 1850. It was around this time that an Illinois senator steered a friend to a hot real estate deal that would make money for everyone. Politics and the spoils of office had already been invented in 1850.

Paul Cornell had been rudely welcomed to Chicago. His life savings were stolen from him as he slept on the night he arrived in the city. A sympathetic lawyer provided Paul with a loan and got him a job. The lawyer's name was Stephen Douglas, as in Stephen Douglas, the Illinois Senator. The job was with the law firm of Skinner & Hoyne (as in Judge Skinner and Hoyne Avenue in the city).

Paulie worked hard, met a girl, got married. His new brother in law was John Evans, the man after whom the city of Evanston was named. Evans, along with a chap named Orrington Lunt (as in Orrington Street in Evanston and Lunt Avenue in Chicago) founded a school, Northwestern University, in his namesake town. John Evans, in turn, was related to George Kimbark (Kimbark Avenue, a north-south street that runs right into the University of Chicago), a real estate speculator and developer who would become the founder of Riverside, IL.

Anyhoo, south of the city there was a 300 acre parcel with a "For Sale" sign in it. The parcel of land extended from what is today 51st Street down to 55th Street and from Lake Michigan to the Illinois Central Railroad tracks.

Cornell bought the land and traded 60 acres to the IC railroad in exchange for the IC constructing a depot at 53rd Street and setting up 6 stops a day in and out of Chicago.
The commuter suburb and commuter railway were born. Cornell named his new area Hyde Park after the London version.

Kimbark bought land just west of Cornell's land. Cornell's uncle bought other adjoining land. The Illinois legislature created Hyde Park Township out of all that. The lads all made just a wee bit of money by developing their land. It probably didn't hurt to have a pal who was a Senator.

Oh, and Paul Cornell, the king of networking in the pre-LinkedIn era, had a cousin named Ezra who kept himself pretty busy, too. Ezra founded Cornell University back east.

Paul Cornell got Cornell Avenue in Hyde Park, a couple of streets east of the school that set up shop in his town, the University of Chicago, on Kimbark, over by there.

A scant 150 or so years later, you may wish to ruminate on all these hooked up guys as you sit in traffic, or sit on the train, or contemplate starting your own suburb so you can get rich and famous.

Ugh.

Since my dad cheated and wrote about American Idol, and because I'm sick today and feeling particularly sorry for myself, here is my contribution to the Commuter Week posts:

I commute between Chicago, the city in which I live, to Las Vegas, the city in which I work, each Monday and Friday. I am spending about 7.5 hours in a plane each week. Add to that number the 45 minutes between Midway and my apartment (once on Monday, once on Friday), and the 30 minutes between McCarran and the client site (once on Monday, once on Friday), plus the 20 minutes between my hotel and the client (my daily commute…eight times per week), and you have a total weekly commute time of 12 hours and 40 minutes. Over the last seven months, I have spent approximately 355 hours commuting, roughly equivalent to two full weeks of my life.

In the same time period, my father has spent just over a day and a half commuting to and from work.

If I had been working in the office during this time, I would have had to face a 30 minute door-to-desk commute twice per day. That adds up to just under 6 days of commute time. I would like 8 days of my life back, please.

If my math is wrong, please forgive me and look the other way. I'm trying to type this quickly since I'm at work right now and should be working, not blogging. My employer can subtract five minutes from the 8 days I am requesting be refunded to my life. That is all.

Commute Week, Part III

The judges commuted the sentence last week, so this week 2 of the remaining 7 American Idol contestants are headed for the discard pile. Yes, I have used a cheap trick to tie in American Idol with the commuting theme of this week, but really, what's more important? I get cranky if I cannot be snide and smug once a week about the sing for your supper gang.

So let's get on with it: it's disco week. Lots of stuff is gonna happen here to rip on, for sure.

Lead off singer was Lil Rounds, singing I'm Every Woman. Poor Lil, she works like crazy to please and seems to be a really nice person. She just doesn't have the charisma to get over the top. There was no excuse about being out of her genre this week. Randy made uncomfortable faces, Kara made noncommital comments and Simon says she gone. I think Paula had left to go to the ladies room.

Kris with a K Allen appears on my television holding an acoustic guitar and dressed in a t-shirt and jeans to do an interpretation of She Works Hard for the Money. I bet this is gonna suck big time! Boy, was I wrong. Accompanied by calypso-street-rock percussion, he blows everyone away with a unique interpretation. I have nothing bad to say, and neither did the judges. Hold on for a moment. Kris keeps doing this annoying "omygawd" grin with his eyes closed. , FINALLY, YES! Something to criticize!

Next was Danny, singing September. It was a fun performance. Another guy that I wanted to rip, and again I'm left with nothing. This night is not working for me.

The little red-haired girl comes next singing Hot Stuff. She reinvented a tired song, and visually this kid made an awesome impression again. You had to see it, if you didn't, go watch the video. Simon said it was "a briliant performance". Since I like the little red-haired girl, I am not disappointed that she did well.

Adam, the chalk in this race, is next. Donna Summer's If I Can't Have You is his choice. Another worn out, crappy song. The big dog reinvents it and hits another home run. The judges appear stunned, in a good way. Paula is on the verge of tears. Simon can't say enough good things. I'm thinking this lad may become a latter generation Freddie Mercury. Our 3:2 wager looks stronger every time this guy performs.
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Matt in the goddamn Hat does Stayin' Alive. He looks dopey thanks to the hat, works hard and comes up blechhhh. Seems like a nice fellow, Mat in the Hat. I bet he'd be a monster talent at the local clubs.,sans hat. He'll be gone, too bad, lad. So will his hat, thank heaven.
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Anoop finishes the show, and probably his run as a contestant, performing Turn on the Lights. This song sucked when it was new, and Anoop puts some weird spins on it, making it the kind of video that they'll use in a couple of years to tease him. The judges are kind (except Simon, thank heaven sometimes for Simon), but they won't save Anoop.
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My bet is that the two who get voted off the island will be Matt with his dopey Hat and Anoop. Top 3, can we bet on Top 3: Big Dog, Red Haired Girl and the other guy.

Commute Week, Part II

More effective than my car crusher at reducing commuting hassle is the state of the economy. According to the N.Y. Times, 30% of travel is commute related. Fewer people working means fewer people traveling on a daily basis.

In New York, ridership on trains is down from last year. Cars passing through toll booths are 5%-6% fewer in number than a year ago. The people who track these numbers say the numbers were down as they are now twice previously: after the 1987 market crash and the 2001 attack on the Twin Towers in NYC.

New Yorkers have the longest average commute to work, Chicagoans are next (that damned 2nd city thing again!).

Here, from the US Census Bureau (motto: it makes perfect Census to us, hahaha!) is a summary of commute times:

Ranking of large cities (populations of 250,000 or more):

• New York (38.3 minutes);
• Chicago (33.2 minutes);
• Newark, N.J. (31.5 minutes);
• Riverside, Calif. (31.2 minutes);
• Philadelphia (29.4 minutes);
• Los Angeles (29.0 minutes)

New York and Baltimore lay claim to having the highest percentage of people with “extreme” commutes; 5.6 percent of their commuters spent 90 or more minutes getting to work. People with extreme commutes were also heavily concentrated in Newark, N.J. (5.2 percent); Riverside, Calif. (5.0 percent); Los Angeles (3.0 percent); Philadelphia (2.9 percent); and Chicago (2.5 percent).

If you have ever been part of the communal parking lots that Los Angeles calls freeways, you are forgiven for questioning the veracity of the data. It is, by the way, data from 2005. The Census folks have been working on updates but are having trouble finding the time. It's the darn traffic...maybe they should try bicycles. Here's 2008 data for the top 5 cities for cycling to work:

• 3.47% Portland, OR
• 2.42% Minneapolis, MN
• 2.31% Seattle, WA
• 2.24% Tucson, AZ
• 1.85% San Francisco, CA

How did Minneapolis get in there?

If we sidestep home officing for the moment, the next best commute is walking. Here's where the walk to work people live:

• 12.55% Boston, MA
• 9.97% Washington, D.C.
• 9.59% San Francisco, CA
• 9.44% New York, NY
• 8.05% Philadelphia, PA

While the car commuters get all the media attention, there's a lot of people who have figured out a better way. The best commute is the stumble down in the stairs in your bunny slippers and turn on the computer commute. Makes my 8 minutes look like an eternity.

Commute Week, Part I

Like most of America, Mrs. PFOS and I suffer through a morning commute to earn our daily bread. Her drive to work is around 4 minutes if the stoplight is green. By comparison, my ride off to work can take a grueling 8, sometimes 10 minutes.

OK, our commuting lives, thru a series of events both fortunate and structured, are above average. My daughter has been commuting 1,900 miles each Monday for the last 7 months. She would be in the "below average" category in terms of being happy with her commute. While we're discussing it, yes, we're all among the fortunate to still be commuting to something during the Great Depression of the 00's. By the way, that is pronounced "oh-ohs", similar to "uh-oh", as in "I hope we've found the bottom before it gets to me".

So, as we begin "Commuting Week" here at NADM, I have chosen to address the problem that vexes most commuters: too many cars. Bear in mind, if you read NADM, you are OK. It is the other people out there, they are the ones who are driving the vehicles that constitute the "too many". Now, this issue of too many cars is a substantial one, with ramifications that are serious and far-reaching, affecting many, many people. I have therefore decided to consult the source to which I frequently turn when I am faced with issues of this magnitutde.

Ebay.

If I were the marketing person at Ebay, I would tell the world "All the answers are here. You just furnish the questions." In this case, the question is too many cars. Here is the answer.

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Big Mac Portable Car Crusher Truck Auto Salvage Trailer

You are Bidding on a Portable Big Mac Car Crusher.
These Machines sell new for around $180,000.00+
　
Rebuilt Detroit Engine
Capable of crushing a car or truck down to 14”
Able to Crush Three to five scrap autos, with or without engines, into thirty-inch high bundles
　
The unit is in Nice Shape, The Cylinders were rebuilt last year.
The Crushing bed was completely rebuilt last summer and built heavier then factory, all work was done professionally by Greiner Industries.
Detroit engine was also rebuilt at the same time.
This machine is equipped with a controller box to add a remote for operating machine from loader, we do not have a remote with the crusher.

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If you would like to pitch in on this, we will set it up on I-55 by the weigh station. We will put up a sign that says "FREE COFFEE AND" People are total suckers for coffee and. There will be a wall of fourteen inch steel bundles, and much more room on I-55, in a couple of days. Then we will move on to another highway.

You have problems, we have answers. Portable, very cool. Sorry about the missing remote.