Eyes--Caroline Says: Look at the space between your eyes--can you imaging another eye fitting there? No? Narrow, you are closed minded. Yes? You are open minded and averse to authority. Perfect fit? Good judgement, balanced view of the world.
Eyes--I say: When I was a kid, I spent a summer working in my uncle's machine shop. One of the employees was Crazy Richie, whose eyes never looked in the same direction simultaneously. He could stand on the corner facing southwest and look east on 51st Street and north on Damen Avenue at the same time. Never knew if he was talking to you, the guy next to you or to himself. Richie could have used that third eye to balance things out, it would have been his "straight ahead eye", kind of like a Bose system, where the bass sounds come from the center speaker. Remember the Creature from the Black Lagoon? One eye, center stage, freaky.
Nose--Caroline says: Big nose, could get caught up in money. Small nose, shy, timid. Wide nose, emotional, laid-back. Thin nose, tightly wound, tempermental.
Nose--I say: If your parents did their job, you learned to keep your nose out of other people's business or risk ending up with a big, wide beezer to help you remember. By the way, did you know that Abraham Lincoln's nose on Mt. Rushmore is 21 feet long? Divine Caroline doesn't talk about that, now does she, or that a big nose makes you personally aerodynamic.
Fingers--Caroline says: Long fingers, deep thinking, logical. Short fingers, goes by gut, sensible.
Fingers--I say: The guy on the highway yesterday had one real long finger and I don't think he was a deep thinker.
The Feet--Caroline says: Podomancy is the study of feet as a means of divination.
The Feet--I say: there is a whole area of fetishism devoted to people who are really into this. It's simple. Some people have really f***ed up feet, all gnarled up and nasty. Some don't. Podomancy my arse.
For more weird Caroline, go to http://www.divinecaroline.com/article/22264/59849-features-say-us
That is all.
2 comments:
I divined that the periodic pins & needles feeling, numbness, and pain I feel in the balls of my feet indicate that excessive running might cause permanent nerve damage. Ok, I didn't divine that. My podiatrist did. Then he divined that because his office is two blocks from my apartment and he takes Saturday apointments, I would ignore the fact that he's a rude and pompous jerk and continue to see him. So, I would say that a narrow size 10 indicates a willingness to suffer.
There's always the option of using one of your long, sensitive fingers to point out that Doctor foot is behaving badly. You don't have that middle eye thing going too, do you?
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