Tuesday, February 10, 2009

135 x Dumb

Ice fishing is an unusual pasttime. It requires, in its simplest form, that one go out in frigid conditions, venture onto an inherently unstable plane, then drill a hole in it and sit and wait. I have done this once or twice, for short periods of time, I must confess. Many do it in earnest, and there is all manner of ice augers, ice rods, ice shacks, heaters, just about every old thing that you might imagine, to enhance the experience. In many places, entire shanty villages spring up during the ice fishing season. There's one overriding rule that governs ice fishing.

You can't be exceptionally stupid.
This past Saturday, 135 Ohio anglers defied the rule and went for a wild ride. The air had become warm and the wind was blowing pretty hard. Defying nature, this crew headed out on the ice pack on foot, on snowmobile and via four wheeler. There was an ominous warning: a large crevasse in the ice sheet. Ever resourceful (this is not the same as intelligent) the anglers used old wooden pallets to build a bridge. They mighta shoulda brought out a few thousand more pallets and hammers and nails and old old Norwegian ship builder named Lars.
You've seen the story; the ice sheet cracked off and Ol' Ma Nature puffed and blew the dummies out into Lake Erie. There is no apparent truth to the rumor that the province of Ontario mobilized to repel an attack of ice invaders. Thank heaven for cell phones, the Coast Guard and helicopters. All were rescued, except for one man who fell off the hard part of the lake and into the wet part and had a heart attack. A number of snowmobiles, ATV's and other miscellaneous equipment were left behind and are, I assume, going to end up at the bottom of Lake Erie.
It's not nice to fool with Mother Nature.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

The only thing I don't like about ice fishing is my husband Don makes me hold the worms in my mouth so they don't freeze.

PURPLE FLAG ON SATURDAY said...

He is a cad...and possibly a bounder.